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To Get Mental Health Help For A Child, Desperate Parents Relinquish Custody

What changes, if any, do you think should be made regarding children's access to mental health care?

by Kaiser Health News | Updated on 1.9.19

When Toni and Jim Hoy adopted their son Daniel through the foster care system, he was an affectionate toddler. They did not plan to give him back to the state of Illinois, ever.

“Danny was this cute, lovable little blond-haired, blue-eyed baby,” Jim said.

Toni recalled times Daniel would reach over, put his hands on her face and squish her cheeks. “And he would go, ‘You pretty, Mom,’ ” Toni said. “Oh, my gosh, he just melted my heart when he would say these very loving, endearing things to me.”

But as Daniel grew older, he changed. He began to show signs of serious mental illness that eventually manifested in violent outbursts and nearly a dozen psychiatric hospitalizations, starting at age 10. Doctors said he needed intensive, specialized care away from home — institutional services that cost at least $100,000 a year.

The family had private insurance through Jim’s job, and Daniel also had Medicaid coverage because he was adopted. But neither insurance would pay for that treatment. Exhausted and desperate, the Hoys decided to relinquish custody to the state. If they sent Daniel back into the foster care system, the child welfare agency would be obligated to pay for the services he needed.

“To this day, it’s the most gut-wrenching thing I’ve ever had to do in my life,” Jim said. He went to the hospital and told Daniel, then 12, that they were legally abandoning him so child welfare could take over. “I was crying terribly. But it was the only way we figured we could keep the family safe.”

Two-thirds of states don’t keep track of how many families give up custody to help a child get mental health services. But a study by the Government Accountability Office found that, back in 2001, families in 19 states relinquished nearly 13,000 children.

Today in Illinois, state records show that dozens of children enter state custody this way each year, despite a 2015 state law aimed at preventing it. And new data collected by the University of Maryland for the federal government finds that Illinois is not alone in failing to address this issue.

Mental health advocates say the problem is one of “too little, too late.” Even when states try to help children get access to treatment without a custody transfer, the efforts come too late in the progression of the children’s illnesses.

The advocates blame decades of inadequate funding for in-home and community-based services across the country — a lack of funding that has chipped away at the mental health system. Without that early intervention, children deteriorate to the point of being needlessly hospitalized and requiring costly residential care.

Until that underlying problem is addressed, child advocates say, the problem of families trading custody for treatment will never truly be solved.

Out Of Options

Daniel grew up as the youngest of four children in Ingleside, north of Chicago. As a baby, he had been severely neglected in his birth family — starved and left for dead. The early trauma Daniel experienced very likely affected his brain development, doctors said.

Toni home-schooled her children until she had to return to work full time in 2005. She said Daniel, who was 10, just fell apart.

“After six weeks of being in a public school classroom — something kids do every day — he couldn’t emotionally handle it and had his first hospitalization,” Toni said.

Daniel’s post-traumatic stress disorder and severe anxiety manifested in violent outbursts.

“He held knives to people’s throats,” Toni said. “He tried putting his fingers and his tongue in the light sockets. He broke almost every door in the house.”

In the car, there were times he’d reach over and grab the wheel while Toni was driving, to try to force the car into oncoming traffic. Other times, he would lash out at his siblings.

“At the same time, he’s a little boy,” she said. “He didn’t want to be that way. He didn’t like being that way.”

Despite Toni and Jim’s efforts to help their son with therapy and medication, the violence escalated, and Daniel was repeatedly hospitalized.

Although his doctors and therapists said he needed residential treatment, which would run at least $100,000 a year, both the family’s private health insurance, and Daniel’s secondary Medicaid coverage, denied coverage.

So the Hoys applied for a state grant meant for children with severe emotional disorders. They also asked for help from Daniel’s school district, which is supposed to cover a portion of the costs when students need long-term, off-site care. They were denied both.

“We were told we had to pay out-of-pocket for it,” Toni said.

Then one night, Daniel picked up his brother Chip, threw him down the stairs and punched him over and over before their dad pulled the boys apart.

Daniel went back to the hospital for the 11th time in two years. That’s when the Illinois Department of Children and Family Services gave the Hoys an ultimatum.

“[They] basically said, ‘If you bring him home, we’re going to charge you with child endangerment for failure to protect your other kids,'” Toni remembered. “‘And if you leave him at the hospital, we’ll charge you with neglect.'”

“If any of our other kids got hurt once we brought him home, they would take the other kids,” Jim said. “They put our backs against the wall, and they didn’t give us any options.” So the couple left Daniel at the hospital.

Once the state’s child welfare agency steps in to take custody, the agency will place the child in residential treatment and pay for it, said Robert Farley Jr., a lawyer in Naperville, Ill., another Chicago suburb.

“So you get residential services, but then you’ve given up custody of your child,” Farley said. “Which is, you know, barbaric. You have to give up your child to get something necessary.”

Taking It To The Courts

The Hoys were investigated by DCFS and charged with neglect. They appealed in court and the charge was later amended to a “no-fault dependency,” meaning the child entered state custody at no fault of the parents.

They didn’t know where Daniel was for several weeks, until he phoned from the group home where he had been placed to tell them he was OK.

Losing custody meant Toni and Jim could visit Daniel and maintain contact with him, but they could not make decisions regarding his care.

Over the next three years, Daniel lived at three residential treatment centers. One was five hours away by car. His parents visited as often as they could.

Toni spent months reading up on federal Medicaid law, and she learned the state-federal health insurance program is supposed to cover all medically necessary treatments for eligible children.

The Hoys hired a lawyer and, two years after giving Daniel up, they sued the state in 2010.

Six months later, they settled out of court and regained custody of Daniel, who was 15 by then. They also got the money to pay for Daniel’s care on their own.

Around the same time, Farley, the attorney, decided to take on the issue on behalf of all Medicaid-eligible children in the state. He filed a class-action lawsuit, claiming Illinois illegally withheld services from children with severe mental health disorders.

“There [are] great federal laws,” he said. “But someone’s not out there enforcing them.”

In his lawsuit, Farley cited the state’s own data, showing that 18,000 children in Illinois have a severe emotional or behavioral disorder, yet only about 200 receive intensive mental health treatment.

As part of a settlement, a federal judge ordered Illinois Medicaid officials to completely overhaul the state system so that kids get home- and community-based treatment in the early stages of their illness.

The deadline for the state to roll out those changes is this month.

A Law That Didn’t Fix The Problem

While these legal battles were taking place, Illinois lawmakers began their own work to ensure that parents no longer have to relinquish custody to get their kids the help they need.

The Custody Relinquishment Prevention Act, which became law in 2015, ordered six state agencies that interact with children and families to intervene when a family is considering giving up custody to get access to services.

“I think the question is: Shouldn’t government be stepping in and doing their job? And they’re not,” said Democratic state Rep. Sara Feigenholtz. “We just want them to do their job.”

B.J. Walker, head of Illinois’ child welfare agency, said the reasons for custody relinquishments are complex.

“If law could fix problems, we’d have a different world,” she said.

In some places, waitlists for residential treatment beds for kids in crisis can be months long.

But even when beds are available, Walker said, some facilities are simply unwilling or unable to take a child who has a severe mental health condition or a co-occurring medical condition.

Out of desperation, some parents will give up custody in the hope of getting their child to the top of the waiting list. But that doesn’t necessarily solve the problem.

As ProPublica Illinois reports, many foster children languish for months in psychiatric wards that are ill-equipped to provide long-term care because the state is unable to place them in an appropriate therapeutic setting. Walker’s agency is being sued for allegedly forcing children to “remain in locked psychiatric wards, causing immense harm,” for weeks or months after they’ve been cleared for discharge.

The Underlying Issue

Neil Skene, spokesman for Illinois’ child welfare agency, said there are more options for families like the Hoys today than there were a decade ago. That includes a crisis-stabilization program launched in 2017 that helps families get access to services.

When the child welfare agency is blamed for this problem, Skene said, it’s like when a pitcher comes in at the end of a losing game to save the day and gets tagged with the loss.

Some mental health advocates agree it’s not fair to fault the state’s child welfare agency for a problem that stems from a chronically underfunded mental health system.

Heather O’Donnell, a mental health advocate who works for Thresholds, a behavioral health treatment provider in Chicago, blames years of inadequate funding in Illinois and across the U.S.

Early-intervention services are either not available or not accessible because insurance companies deny coverage.

“If these kids had leukemia or diabetes, they would’ve gotten help long, long before,” O’Donnell said. “It’s because they have a mental health condition that causes their behavior to be challenging and erratic. And as a society, we sweep these conditions under the rug until there’s a crisis. We just wait for tragedy.”

“What Illinois needs to put into place is a system that helps these families early on, so that these kids never get hospitalized,” O’Donnell said.

Beth Stroul, who has been studying the problem of custody relinquishment for decades, agrees. She is the lead researcher on a new study — commissioned by the federal government and carried out by the University of Maryland — that explores why the problem persists.

Stroul said other states, including Georgia and New Jersey, have passed laws and stepped up efforts to help children get treatment while in parental custody.

“But those strategies, in and of themselves, are not sufficient unless there are home- and community-based services available that provide the supports and treatment needed to keep children and families safe in the community,” Stroul said.

The Difference Treatment And Family Can Make

Daniel Hoy is now 24 and has been out of residential treatment — and stable — for six years.

He said treatment was tough, and he would not have gotten better without his parents’ love and support. “It was never a question in my mind that my parents would always be there for me,” he said. “Sometimes it’s so hard to do it for yourself. It almost helps to know that I’m doing it for myself, but I’m also doing it for my family and for our relationship.”

Daniel now works nights for a shipping company and lives with his girlfriend and their toddler daughter in central Illinois, not far from his parents.

“I just love having a relationship with him,” Jim said. “I feel so privileged that [when] he’s having a bad day, he comes over and talks to us about it.”

Toni said, looking back, it’s shameful that families get torn apart by a system that’s supposed to be supportive.

She is grateful they made it through intact. Other families that have gone through this same thing, she said, have lost touch with their child forever. “Kids do need services,” Toni said. “But they also need the support of their families.”

This story is part of NPR’s reporting partnership with Side Effects Public Media and Kaiser Health News. A longer version of this story appears in The Workaround podcast. Christine Herman is a recipient of a Rosalynn Carter fellowship for mental health journalism. 

Kaiser Health News

Written by Kaiser Health News

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(31)
  • Marylynn
    01/11/2019
    ···

    This is repulsive and I truly hope our lawmakers do something about it. Parents shouldn't have to relinquish their rights to their children in order to get help.

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  • burrkitty
    01/11/2019
    ···

    So sad. Mental healthcare is healthcare and everyone has the right to it. CRADLE TO GRAVE UNIVERSAL HEALTHCARE SYSTEM FOR ALL.

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  • Chickie
    01/11/2019
    ···

    These are the topics that are most important to every day Americans. The current condition of our healthcare system is shameful. Mental health illnesses should be treated under the same standards as any other illness. The answer is NOT having parents to give up their children with the hope the child will receive the care they desperately need. We are the United States of America ~ we should be so much better than this. Representatives MUST focus on what is important to their constituents. End the three ring circus over #45’s Wall. Over 800,000 federal employees do not want ideas on how to make money, (hold a yard sale, Seriously?) Pass the House Bill without initial funding of The Wall, send it to the Senate for their approval. If #45 Veto’s the bill, the Senate MUST pass it with 2/3 votes in favor of the bill. Once done, get yourselves back to getting our government back in order. Medicare for ALL Americans, including ALL elected representatives.

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  • Dara
    01/11/2019
    ···

    The inability to provide mental health services and support for mentally challenged individuals is a humanitarian crime. Shame on the insurance industry, politicians, and ignorance in this country that do not address this issue. Congress get off your penguin butts and provide services for these individuals, minors or adults. The insurance industry should cease to exist for this atrocity.

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  • August
    01/12/2019
    ···

    If this story is not enough to fix our healthcare, especially mental health, then we have truly lost our compassion as a civilized nation.

    Like (4)
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  • NoHedges
    01/11/2019
    ···

    Why isn’t this being brought to the floor for a vote.

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  • Cosmo
    01/11/2019
    ···

    Very difficult subject to have an opinion on. Most care givers only accept cash. Insurance companies do not reimburse adequately for a Doctor to take on the process of paperwork, claims and reduced income. Does mental health warrant Federal and or State financial help? Yes! The reason is mental health issues if not caught early and appropriate medicines evaluated, the patient can, depending on the illness, become aggressive. Parents must evaluate their child’s behavior. Parents are not stupid. They know their child. Rather than spending monies on a new car, new mattress, new anything, consider seeking medical help if your child, spouse, or relative is feeling poorly. By you being aware you may possibly save a life.

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  • Ken
    01/11/2019
    ···

    Mental health conditions don't require a broken arm to be reset or stitches to mend a cut arm. A child with a broken arm is seen as an emergency so the break can be set and allowed to heal. Mental illnes is treated much differently. Shame keeps many from coming forward. you don't make conditions better by blaming the one with the condition, then doing nothing. Mental illness is becoming a pandemic in the U.S. and it's time to start treating it accordingly.

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  • David
    01/11/2019
    ···

    For parents to be forced to give up their child to get mental health services for that child is revolting. After 45 years working in mental health the continued stigma creates barriers that impair families, suppress opportunities for those who are mentally ill, punish the mentally ill for being ill.

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  • Andy1
    01/11/2019
    ···

    Mental health needs to be taken more seriously. From the youngest children all the way to the presidency we tend to ignore or explain away the obvious, but treatable mental health issues that affect so many.

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  • Robert
    01/11/2019
    ···

    How Sad😫

    Like (2)
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  • John
    01/11/2019
    ···

    Universal single payer healthcare, cradle to grave!

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  • Mary
    01/11/2019
    ···

    Again and again health problems especially mental health problems could be effectively dealt with if you representatives would care enough about your constituents who are not bribing you with large campaign donations.We need free healthcare including mental health and drug rehab. You are paid by us even during this insane shutdown over a wall we do not need. Put that money into our healthcare where it can do the greatest good.

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  • nyyblb
    01/11/2019
    ···

    This is TERRIBLE! No parent or other legal guardian should ever, ever have to give up custody of a child in order for that child to get proper mental health treatment. We have enough problems with our dependency system being completely broken in Florida. In September 2018, there was a 2 yr old boy who was killed by his biological mother shortly after being returned to her custody (https://www.abcactionnews.com/news/region-north-pinellas/largo/-failed-by-the-system-foster-parents-devastated-after-2-year-old-killed-by-biological-mother). That is an extreme example, but no parent/guardian should have to give their child to the dependency system. I am a volunteer Guardian ad Litem and Surrogate Parent (aka Educational GAL), so I see the system from the inside. I work for the Best Interests of the child(ren) that I am appointed to. I want these kids to be SAFE. I would never willingly separate a kid from a loving, nurturing, and safe parent/guardian. So, why do we have a mental health/health insurance system that would force those same parents/guardians to make that awful choice just to get the necessary treatment for those kids??

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  • Colleen
    01/11/2019
    ···

    If that child were an illegal, our government would be all over helping him. It is horrible that adoptive parents have to go to that extreme to help a child that they live. The repercussions of this will affect this child in a negative way for the rest of his life

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  • Jeffrey
    01/11/2019
    ···

    All Americans that suffer from Mental Health issues should be afforded the care necessary to treat it and make them better more productive members of society. This is especially true for the youngest most impressionable of our communities: Children. All children should be able to get mental health care and stay with their families whether biological or adoptive. To have to give their kids back to the state just because they couldn’t afford treatment for their son is sad and uncalled for...there should be a requirement that insurance provide necessary care for mentally unstable kids through their parents insurance to ensure the safety and wellbeing of the child as well as the rest of the family

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  • Vanessa
    last Monday
    ···

    Is there a way we can stop biological parents from having children if they can’t take care of them? This story is heart breaking but so typical of children who are abused and neglected by birth parents who should not be having any more children. It’s very tragic, but you know the funds for this medical treatment is coming out of the hard earned money of taxpayers who are already strapped to provide for their own families. It’s heart breaking, but there are no easy answers.

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  • Cindy
    01/11/2019
    ···

    This is the best single payer and universal healthcare have to offer, no input from the patient or family a ward of the government. Welcome to what Democrats want for all of healthcare.

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  • Lionman
    01/11/2019
    ···

    Honestly, this sort of ‘sacrifice’ by loving parents is the true insanity. No parent should have to give up their child in order to get them the care they need.

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  • Terry
    01/11/2019
    ···

    These are the areas where The Govt. should step in. But not a total takeover.

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